3 Reasons Why Shimmy Hates Autumn
I can give you at least 15 legitimate reasons why I’m loathing the fact that summertime is over, but since I have a tendency to be quite considerate of your time, I’ll share around 3 instead. Deal?
No Mo’ Booty Shorts
…or anything showing skin for that matter.
You see, it truly behooves me to think that my days of flexing in my complexion are indeed over. As a matter of fact, I’m in such bewilderment that I’m going to rebel and continue to rock tank tops, cut offs, and gladiator sandals regardless. And this cute onesie bathing suit I’m donning - yeah, I’m not taking that off either!
Hmmmmm….I guess all hope isn’t lost, however. There’s always wiggle room in the fashion industry to still rock Daisy Dukes despite the chilled mornings discouraging you from doing so. The only difference is now I have to put mesh or fishnet tights on underneath. Topping that off with a pair of patent leather Dr. Marten’s and a cable knit sweater, and I’m practically back in cleavage heaven, right? RIGHT?
Cakes Have Layers
…and so do we now that it’s unfortunately Fall.
Just look at all the layers I’m wearing - 1. And guess what?! I’m not even cold! From basking in the sweltering hot sun to the red hot price tag of this onesie from Forever 21 (shoutout to end of season sales), ya girl is feeling and looking fine! Can’t you tell from my million dollar grin, courtesy of Phillips Zoom DayWhite gel! ;)
A frown is about to set in, however, especially with the skillset needed in order to successfully layer leather jackets, turtlenecks, and long johns without appearing bulky with a noticeable stiffness to accompany your hulk. Ugh! I’m assuming this means no more stretching my arms to wave at cuties without rolling up my 3 layers of sleeves beforehand. But eh, at least I’ll be cozy while bobbing for apples!
Bold but not Bright
…my clothes will be dull on sight (yes, I’m a poet!).
Like that yellow? Love how it compliments my mocha-cocoa skin tone? Well, revel in it now cuz I doubt you’ll be seeing anymore of that hue anytime soon. Instead, you’ll be eyeing sullen splashes of mustard, merlot, and forest green. That’s right, from now on, Anastasia’s Heather will be my go-to lippie and wide brimmed felt hats will accessorize my crown of curls.
Don’t get me wrong though cuz we all know that switching it up is fun and oftentimes necessary, but who cares! This is literally heart wrenching and frightful. What’s a girl to do? Attend a Fall Festival or something? Humph!
Be honest, do you think I’ll ever accept this equinox? Maybe after a hay ride or two or perhaps a waltz past the fragrant smells of Bath and Body Works will bring the pumpkin spice cheer I desperately don’t crave.
So now you tell me, are you ready for crunchy leaves you’ll eventually have to rake and haunted houses galore? Leave your candy corn and comments below!
Remember to Live Life, Beautifully ♥